Making “Us” A Priority


One of my goals for this year is to work on being SLOW to be able to listen well. This means growing and learning more as a wife. Adding a baby the mix has brought fun new challenges to our marriage. We have been married for 6.5  wonderful years and I can’t wait to celebrate 50 more, but it will be “work”. I want to make sure that we are making US a priority.

I have some pretty amazing friends that have shared some wonderful tools that help keep their marriages strong and FUN!

Dinner Passport: I have created a fun blank notebook for Hubby and I to document new restaurants that we try out. We tend to always go to the same places, but this year we have made it a goal of ours to try new places! We have also made date night a priority. When it was just the two of us, we would go out all the time and didn’t take one moment for granted. Now since we need a babysitter and have less date nights, we want each of them to be even more intentional and meaningful (not like they weren’t before).


5 Questions: My best friend shared with me these 5 questions from Todays’s Letters that she and her husband go over every Sunday night before the week begins. I just loved them and knew that I wanted to make this a weekly tradition for the hubby and me. It has been wonderful! It gives us time to communicate and make sure that there are not hidden agendas or expectations.

1. How did you feel loved this past week?
2. What does your upcoming week look like?
3. How would you feel most loved & encouraged in the days ahead?
4. How would you best feel pursued in sex / intimacy this week?
5. How can I pray for you this week?


Date Night Swap: Like I said earlier we are making it a point to have a date night once a week. Well with that comes the need of a baby sitter. I have decided to come up with a Date Night Swap with some close friends.

Here’s how the Date Night Swap works:

1. Find a friend or neighbor that you trust with your kids.
2. Pick a day and time that works best for both couples once a month.
3. One parent goes  to the other couple’s house to babysit (most likely mom, but it doesn’t matter) while the other stays home with their kids.

We all know that date nights are extremely important. Not only are we kindling the flames of our relationship with our mates, but our children are learning something important too!! When you go out on a date, your child sees how much you value each other. They see that your relationship with your mate is so great that you do lots of fun, cool, and amazing things together to keep it going. I am realizing the importance of this even more now with RJ!

This past date night the Hubby did GOOOOOOOD! He took me out for some wine and then we got mani pedi’s! I cant not tell you how much this meant to me.


We also got dinner at a new place in downtown Redlands, called Darby’s. It’s a sports bar (not super romantic, but fun)!


They have some fun looking salads on their menu as well as all kinds of other yummy dishes! Everything has names that are unique to Redlands like the Redlands Bowl Fries.


I ordered the Jimmy’s D’s Quinoa Stack; it has a green apple next to the name meaning healthy. It started with pomegranate vinaigrette quinoa, layered with avocado, fresh mango, tomatoes, marinated cucumber slices, red onion slivers, and cilantro. Something that I can make at home for sure, but it was still delish!


Because it wasn’t a huge dish, I was still pretty hungry so we went to A La Minute a local nitrogen ice-cream shop that uses liquid nitrogen and as many organic, local ingredients as possible. In the spirit of trying new things, (that’s my motto this year) I tried the Avocado ice-cream, I wasn’t the biggest fan but it was sweeter than I thought it would be. They were sweet to let me exchange it for my favorite, the salted caramel, but hey I tried something new!


Making “US” a priority only helps us to appreciate each other even more! We have to savor and relish every minute we have alone with one another. Feeling loved by one another is not an easy task, but when we do we get to pour out that love to others so much more. It makes us a better wife, husband, and parents to RJ.



Do you have regularly date nights?
What is one tool that you have used that helps you communicate?
Do you like to try new things?


16 responses to “Making “Us” A Priority”

  1. The kid swapping is such a good idea! I don’t have children, and my boyfriend and I don’t really have a date night, but we do go out to the movies or out to dinner pretty regularly. Im sure kids make that much harder to do.

  2. you know i feel like david and I have never really done “date” night per say…I kind of feel like every night we are just enjoying each other. I do think that’s awesome, but the down side is we probably need to take time for a little more romance. Great reminder.

  3. LOVE the dinner passport idea!
    We have always done date days/nights, usually one a month before baby and we are still doing that now after baby. I agree it is very important to keep up.
    This is an awesome post!

  4. I love this! My hubs and I have been married almost 12 years. Since our kids came along 3 1/2 yrs ago, date nights have been few and far between. Last year we started doing date days instead of spending money on a babysitter. We both take the day off from work, while the kids are in school and spend the day doing whatever we want together. Now that the kids are getting older, I’m really seeing the need for us to get away and spend more along time sans kids. It’s vital for our marriage and a happy family.

  5. I love your ideas, the passport especially. My hubs and I are coming up on 10 years and for the past two years we’ve been going on weekly date nights (thanks to my MIL who comes every Thursday). I look forward to these nights so much. I need them. WE need them. They are the highlight of my week and the moment when we connect. It’s so incredibly important, especially for our kids to see us going out together and investing in us. My husband also takes our daughter (4) on regular date nights and it is incredibly special to her and I know will help her develop in to a confident young woman.

  6. I love this post. We don’t have kids yet, but with a busy life even as a childless couple making time can be really hard. I love all of these tips for now and for when we might have little ones! Something I wish we would do more is take pictures. When we find the time to go out, we rarely take pictures and I always regret it later.

  7. This post gave me the best warm fuzzies! My boyfriend is my best friend and I hope when we are married and if we have kids we are still able to keep our relationship a priority. I think the fact that both our parents have been married a long time (my parents since they were 23, his since teenagers!) and are still extremely in love and make time for each other, it’s easier for us than people who haven’t grown up with happy and healthy relationship role models!

    1. P.S. let us know how NROL Supercharged goes! I’m doing NROLFW at the moment and won’t know what to do with myself once it’s finished!

  8. My husband and I attempt to try new restaurants in Toronto, but more often, we frequent are favourites. There is comfort in knowing that the food is great and you will actually get a seat somewhere!

    Communication is so so key. And for me, it’s an area that I am continually growing in. Easy communication does not come easy for me, an introvert, but I have been making more of a conscious effort to be open and honest.

  9. Love this, Bobbi! <3

  10. Love that you are making you a priority. The dinner passport is such a cute idea. I love passport stamps.

  11. We don’t have children yet BUT we do have a date night every Saturday. We may only go to dinner and come home and watch a movie but we always disconnect from technology and focus on each other!

  12. That passport idea is really fun! My husband and I swap date nights once a month with a couple from our church. It has been great!

  13. I love the passport idea. So fun! Totally going to do that!

  14. I am all about try new and different things with my hubby – it is the spice of life! and I agree that making “us” a priority, in turn makes the whole family better

  15. I love these ideas! Especially the passport. Chicago has so many restaurants, and sometimes we forget which new ones want to explore. I think I will make a passport to help us remember!

    Another fun idea for you: Each of you write two date ideas and don’t tell each other. You put them in a sealed envelope, and when it’s time for date night we draw to see what we will do. My husband puts a ton of thought into them. Love it!